Books and covers…

abuse

 

We see many people and gleen an impression of whom we thing they are. What’s wrong with that picture? Well, maybe after reading the image and this post, you may just stop doing that.

I saw this on Pinterest and found myself deeply moved by its content. Not because it spoke to the mysterious “he” that it spoke of, but more to the fact that it so reminded me of a friend.  What impacted me the most about it, was it spoke damn near spot on to how I watched her act in almost all the years we’ve been friends, but primarily over the past decade.  She promotes self-imposed image and role of the “good girl”, the poster image mother, the entitled, and other such lofty positions/opinions. I’ve watched her polish up the veneer she wears so proudly to detract from the fact that this very thought-provoking image proves.

All too often, things such as the B&B and depicted is targeted toward me; however, I’d like to counter that and say, women as pretty much on par with this form of behaviour.  It’s more socially acceptable for the women to be or play “the victim”, so they’re more likely to get away with it or have it dismissed or ignored.  Personally, I think it’s all bullsh*t!  I’m sick and tired of the ghosts of women past, who fought and died for the equal rights women have come to afford, want, and/or expect, essentially for naught.  Now, I’m not saying there aren’t those who are actual victims, but for crying out loud, let’s not continue to buy into the bullsh*t.  Yes, men are often times guilty and less likely to seek counseling, treatment, or some form of help for whatever their emotional issue is, but I bet any one of you fine readers can identify a woman who personifies the B&B.

Please don’t think for one minute I’m disparaging my friend of speaking behind her back because that is certainly not the case. I have spoken with her about her viewpoint, antics, and actions and I very much still care for her; however, her antics leave much to be continually desired.  I’ve been the party that sided with her and comforted her while she played the victim.  For decades she has chosen this behaviour as a front to not dealing with real issues.  Sadly, the Baiting and Bashing has played a part in the demise of her marriage and adversely affected our friendship.  Her soon to be ex-husband has his own issues and culpability, which lead to where they are now, but, I say once again, I’ve seen and heard first hand the B&B.  I’ve tried to talk to my friend and offer my suggestions on how to best work through her issues, but it remains an action undone.  I can’t continue to aid and abet in such behaviour as I find it counter-intuitive to ones growth and development, so I remain distant and hope that she’ll one day see past herself and deal with the issues that have caused her to be this way.

At the end of the day, I live by the rule of, “what’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong”.  I’m not a sugar coat it kind of gal; I say what I mean and mean what I say.  I’m rarely passive-aggressive and would rather own my words and actions than pass the blame.  Life comes with good and bad and we must accept it and work toward that which we’ve earned and not what we feel entitled too.

angrynarc1

Yea, I said it!

Likes/Dislikes – The Relationship Edition

Likes

  • Fidelity
  • Open and honest communication
  • Being friends and lovers
  • Respecting/appreciating ones individuality
  • Companionship
  • The difference between sex and intimacy
  • Extended family
  • Committment
  • Being on the same team/one accord
  • Strength in numbers
  • Being in one for the right reasons

Dislikes

  • Infidelity
  • Neediness
  • Selfishness/imbalance
  • Extended family
  • Lack of trust
  • Always “we/us” (not respecting ones individuality)
  • Being compared to
  • Emotional baggage
  • Abuse
  • Being in one for all the wrong reasons
  • Emotional manipulation

That is all!

More ways to stretch your $$

With this jacked up economy and the rising fuel costs, I wanted to share some additional tips on how to save some money…

Iced coffee – Buy the flavoured creamer of your choice which is usually about $2.29 and add it to a pot of brewed coffee and keep  it chilled in your fridge until you’re ready to use it.  This saves up to $15 a week

Iced Tea – Same concept as Iced Coffee.  Brew the tea, add honey or sweetener of choice, and lemon/lime and save yourself from buying Arizona or whichever brand you do

Rotisserie Chicken – If you don’t have time to cook, instead of buying a meal for one from KFC or the like, buy a Rotisserie Chicken from your grocery store and you can eat off it for a few days . Use some as is, make into a chicken salad, make sandwiches, or add to a salad.  You’ll get 3-4 uses for roughly $5.99 a chicken

Coffee or Tea To Go – Unless you work for a company that provides coffee/tee or you have a per monthly unlimited coffee/tea club, you can save money by buying a Thermos (typically about $15-20 for lifetime use) and make your coffee/tea at home and then bring it with you drink from during the day.  I make tea at home in my travel cup for the ride in and also make tea in my 24oz Thermos which allows me to have hot tea to drink throughout the day.  Saving of almost $10 a week

Snacks – Purchase snacks for yourself as you would for your children and then bring them to work so you can stop buying snacks from the vending machine which average $1.25 per purchase

Bottled Water – Purchase a case of water and bring it to work instead of buying it from a vending machine. Or if you have filtered water at home, bring your water to work in a portable container.  A case of water averages $5.99 instead of $1.50 from a machine

Deli meats – Purchase deli meat and make your sandwiches the night before so you can grab and go in the morning.  The average pound of deli meat is $6.99 where one sandwich can cost that

Leftovers for lunch – Depending on what the meal was the night before, that’s always a viable option

Seasonal Items – Now that Easter (or any holiday) has passed, take advantage of the reduced prices on non-perishable items that you may need for next year such as eggs, grass, baskets, paper products, etc.  Check the shelf life on candy and you may be able to purchase certain candies also.  Store them in air tight containers to preserve them

Cable – Contact your cable company and inquire about any unadvertised specials/promotions they may have in order to reduce your bill.  Or if the show you were watching on a Premium Channel is done for the season, consider canceling the subscription until it comes back. You may be able to save $10-20 a month

Dining Out – Check with local places you dine at to see if they have any specials.  My local Thai spot that offers a 3-course meal between 5-6pm for $10.95 Monday – Friday

Coupons – I’m sure everyone is aware of using coupons, but some may not know that stores like Target have their own coupons that can be used in conjunction to a manufacturer coupon; sometimes doubling what you’ll save on the product.  Also, mobile coupons offer additional savings and are stored right on your phone so you don’t have to worry about forgetting your coupon at home

I hope these tips will help to keep some of your hard earned money in your pockets.

That is all!