Blog Challenge: Day 30 — A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

quote

 

Dear (former) Me:

I’m so happy that you’re happy!  I like that you’ve been able to accomplish so much in spite of your past, your pain, and your trials. God did as He said he would, and turned them all around and made you triumphant and victorious.  You tripped and fell many times and questioned yourself, your direction, and even your purpose in life, but you stood up; you fought on and stopped berating yourself for the choices you made.  You came to truly love yourself and for that you should be very proud.

intelligence is sexy

You always relied on your smarts and not your looks to make it through.  Not society, not people, and most importantly; not yourself allowed you to be “just a pretty face”.  As you would say, if you were, you’d be f*cked in life…lol!  You focused on what is truly important and that’s your brain, your content of character and your ability to see beyond what’s so obvious.  Intelligence has gotten you out of many a compromising situation, not an ability to play dumb.

be nice

In spite of the pain others have inflicted, you were never a hurt person; hurting others.  You remained compassionate and kind to other’ even those unworthy of your kind heart.  Your random acts of kindness weren’t always random, but planned and intended to make a difference.  Why?  Because it was important to you.  You are an inherently good person who took all her pain and transformed it into something beautiful; something positive.

u r special

Even though you weren’t always told you were special or made to feel as such, you finally found a way to tell yourself that.  You opened your heart to the most important person…YOURSELF and allowed yourself to feel, know, and believe you are special.  You no longer allow others to make you feel what they want you to feel.  You’ve come to stand up for yourself, know yourself, appreciate yourself, and be the wonderful person God created you to be.  I’m so very proud of you for that.

tumblr_lsd0ma3vek1r38zjso1_500

Given that your modeling in life was rather questionable, you learned to stand firm by yourself and for yourself.  You became your own advocate and ultimately, you’re own hero.  You don’t look to others to honour or validate you because you don’t need it.  You are uniquely and beautifully made and you’ve embraced it fully.  You’ve fought the championship bouts in the ring of life and came out the victor; not necessarily for your strength, but for the weakness you felt and needed to overcome.  You armoured up and said, “I refuse to back down.  I’ve taken too much for too long and now I’m fighting back”. That, my dear, is worth the title of (s)hero!

with god

When all else failed and people let you down, God was always there with you.  Too often you tried to go it alone, but you always had the good sense to open your heart back to  Him.  You allowed Him to take the wheel and steer you on your course and it paid off. You trusted.  You believed.  You held your faith.  You trusted. You suffered, ultimately you were rewarded. God’s grace is exhibited in and through you because you knew that you are better off with Him than without.  Hats off to you for that!

journey-butterflies-vi

So, here you are now, a transformation from a broken and wounded child to a strong and beautiful woman whose battle scars serve as honour badges for the victories won.  I am so very proud of you and I love you more than you know.

 

(current) Me

 

Yea, I said it!

Who the what now?

Recently a good friend and I were having a conversation about people who are always full of drama, negativity, or are always asking for advice.  She then told me those people are called Askholes?  Now, I see you looking at the screen like Huh?

askholeWell, that’s the definition of it.  I’m sure Webster isn’t up on it yet, but it should be.  Don’t we all know someone who fits this title?  For shits and giggles, please share the Askhole in your life and for their protection, you can alter their names.  Hahaha!

 

Yea, I said it!

 

Blog Challenge: Day 29 — Something you hope to change about yourself. And why

being me

I’m not sure there is much I really want to change about myself.  I’ve worked hard and overcome much to be at peace with the woman I’ve come to be, so, by doing that, why would I want to change?

being me quoteFurthermore, if I change, would I still be authentically who I am?  That’s rhetorical at best, so we’ll conclude with the fact that I don’t want to change anything.

 

Yea, I said it!

Blog Challenge: Day 28 — What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

ept

If I were pregnant, I’d want to know how it happened and why?  Hehe 😉  Given I had my tube tied back in 1996 and My Love had a vasectomy, the odds of my getting pregnant are nil! Yay me!

Jokes aside, if I found myself pregnant at my current age (47), I can’t say I’d be exactly thrilled about it.  Why?  Didn’t you just read how old I am?  The risks would be high and quite frankly, I’m too old to be getting pregnant.  At this juncture, I’m in the waiting stage to become a grandmother, so being pregnant now would add another layer of Jerry Springer ish to my already Jerry Springer reminiscence to my life and I’m not having any of it.

Now, if I were younger and wanted to be pregnant or was considering pregnancy, I’m with someone who’d be a great supporting partner and future parent and I wouldn’t worry about it.

pregancy couple

 

Yea, I said it!

Blog Challenge: Day 26 — Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

suicide

This is an incredibly painful one as I’ve lost someone very close to me to suicide.  I knew of his pain, the alcoholism, the depression, and over the years tried to intervene in an effort to prevent it; sadly nothing worked and four years ago, he took his life.  He left behind a daughter; his only child.  His family.  His friends. And to date, no one has comes to terms with it.  There was no note; therefore, no explanation; only speculation.

Even though I self-injured, which is a NON-suicidal coping mechanism,  for almost three decades, I can’t actually say I’ve ever really wanted to give up on life.  I know I had a lot of issues that contributed to my pain and reasons to self-injure; suicide has never been an option.  Life, even with its pain, chaos, and turbulent nature still has many good aspects to it and is worth living.

Given my proximity to suicide, I find myself angered by a society that constantly thrusts things, people, and images in our faces and lives that contribute to people feeling inadequate, alienated, chastised, and marginalized, which are triggers for suicide or attempts at suicide.  It’s not solely because one is weak why they take their lives and more needs to be done in forms or acceptance and tolerance to prevent suicides from occurring.  We need to be more interactive, more kind, more willing to help others in order for those feeling like they have no way out; to have a person and/or resource to help them cope.

The second week of September is National Suicide Week, but it should be everyday.  We each can take a stand to be more proactive, more loving, more kind, and certainly more aware of change in another’s behaviour, mindset, or emotions.  There are many resources available for those in need of counseling and the following Google link shows some of them Suicide Prevention Information

love yourself untitled

 

Seeking help makes you stronger than your weakness and I pray that someone in need will reach out and get the help they need.

 

Yea, I said it!