“…it’s important not to invalidate your feelings. Your feelings are telling you something important. Do not rush to act on the first whim, take time to hear the full message.”
When I read this excerpt this morning, it was a confirmation; not that I needed it; so, it was more like a reaffirmation of how I handle myself and my emotions. As stated in previous posts, when I have had things on my mind, but don’t always address them; instead, I wait until I see if the feeling dissipates or lingers as the former typically is a knee jerk reaction; resting on the latter as being something I need to consider and/or address. Unlike in the past where I tended to suppress or ignore my feelings; often leaving me in an emotionally destitute place, I’ve stopped playing the martyr and sacrificing my feelings, well-being, and/or happiness in favour of placating someone else. I learned a long time ago that feelings aren’t right or wrong; they just are, but I like to add what the quote states to it now.
It’s important to recognize and realize that when someone says, “oh suck it up”, or “you’ll get over it” when it comes to how you feel about something tends to come from a negative place within that person where they can’t handle what’s being said or they aren’t equipped within their own emotion state to show the necessary compassion, understanding, or even their complicity in what’s being brought to them. While it could be very easy to simply assume their words and dismiss your feelings; do not. Instead, find another approach to address said person, but never disregard your feelings by allowing someone to belittle you or your feelings.
Keep yourself open to the voice inside of you and the emotions conjured as a result. Look inward to see where they’ve stemmed from, what your reaction is, and how best to mitigate the circumstance. Take ownership if/where necessary in what you’re feeling and why you feel how you do and bring it all to the conversation when it takes place. Remind yourself that you may be received with hostility or reproach, but let the loftier thought of your self-preservation and well-being are at stake in order to remain on course and diligent in remedying the situation or circumstance. You are entitled to your feelings, but you aren’t entitled to hurt someone and the contrary is likewise true. Let your inner voice be your compass north as it’s the one true feeling that won’t let you down; it’s the last piece of the childhood innocence and purity you have left.
That is all!